Regulation #34 B

The Multimedia design center has a strict no food policy. Food, otherwise known as edibles, is essential to human survival. Without it we would starve. Much as, if you do not acquire liquid, you will die of dehydration, as I learned in my 400 level biology class.

Another thing which is essential to our survival is teh internetz, otherwise known as Facebook. In order to make use of this essential resource, we must use electronics. Because in today's modern society, electronics are such an essential part of society, society is known to have both food and electronics. But food is deadly to electronics. It leaves harmful residues.

 Thus, a contradiction; to food, or to electronic? That is the question.

How I felt while I was writing this blog.

The library, and the University of Delaware, in its infinite wisdom, has elected to follow the second path. There will be no food in this structure. The punishment for violating this policy is Diana. The punishment for repeat violations is death, by Diana.

A resident of Middletown returns to his residence after learning that one of his neighbors brought a croissant into the Student Multimedia Design Center. (January 2014, Photograph by Richard Johnson)



As I learned in real life, the reason for this draconian policy is to prevent people like you from damaging our electronics. People like you have been walking on in here, moving around with your open coffees and your waffles with syrup, and gravitating towards our electronics, casually smearing the surfaces with substances...substances that leave residues, and damage valuable components, such as the mouse pad. It is because of people like you that we have poverty in the world.

So be a good citizen, and don't bring your substances in here. Unless your going to share.

I am hungry. Sitting at the desk puts great demands on my svelte physique.

svelte: (adjective, for a person) : slender and elegant.